Trailer Park Life

Life in a Trailer Park can sometimes be funny, sad, crazy or plain interesting.

The Trailerhood, is waking up.

~ Ron Walker ~ 12 Comments

It has been so quiet around here, that I had to take a walk around the area to make sure they hadn’t turned it into a cemetery, and neglected to tell me. That was two weeks ago.

A new Genius on the block

It seems like the walk I took, woke up some long dead spirits, and they have possessed some trailerhood denizens. Right after that walk, I noticed a new trailer being pulled in. In about an hour, there was a call to the county to send a deputy out to a disturbance. You guessed it, the new tenants were already fighting. County arrived and took the male person of the family unit to the jailhouse for assaulting the female person of the new family unit, in front of the Deputies! Now that is true genius I tell you.

If you can’t take it home, better leave it alone.

It just seems to have  come to life around here. There is a guy that lives about 2 houses up from the park, that walks down this way to the mailboxes chatting on his phone. More than likely that will erupt if and when it turns out he’s chatting to someone he shouldn’t be, necessitating having to walk away from the house to not be heard. 

Thou Shalt Not…  Whatever.

Last Sunday, I’m out front vacuuming the car out. I hear a vehicle braking hard and a door slam. Very loud voices and cursing. I look two doors down, and It seems the preacher from a nearby church, came to voice his displeasure to a member that called him out in front of members, for not paying him for work to the church.  They were both screaming at one another, and one or both were cursing. I thought it would come to blows, all in front of what looked to be a tiny 3 or 4 year old little girl, watching the whole thing. They finally separated and it was over.

If I had a Dollar for every time.

Yesterday, I heard loud voices shouting outside my room. I look out to see a black-male following a white female gesturing to her. He stopped at the mail boxes, got out and opened the passenger door, and told her to get in gesturing angrily and shouting. She refused, and starting walking back towards my direction. I grabbed my cell phone in case it got too bad. I caught him driving in a hurry past her (back home I guess) and she was walking back the same direction. As they say, If I had a dollar for every time I’ve seen this around here.

Sunday morning Drunks.

Annabelle, Michelle’s Service Dog, awakened me around 4:30am. So I got up to check the house. Out front near the edge of our yard was a pickup truck  sitting there with its lights on shining into our yard.

My first thought, someone breaking into something, but what idiot, would park their vehicle with their lights shining into the windows of the residence. Then I remembered the genius mentioned above, so I decided to let the dogs out to check the back yard for me, while I checked our vehicle.

I waited about 15 minutes to see if there would be anyone around it. I was picking up the phone to call the county when I heard the engine roar, a thump, and in a moment the sound of squealing tires as it entered the highway. Apparently the person was intoxicated, had pulled off the road to get their bearings. When I stopped watching from the dark, and turned on the office light, they spooked. Instead of backing up, they drove forward. They had failed to note the large railroad timbers laying on the ground in front of them and drove over them. Navigated through our yard, missing our vehicle by about 4 inches maybe.

I ran outside and saw the pickup going down the highway. I checked and the car was not damaged, so they missed. Drunks are lucky that way.

Came over the timbers and bricks

Not sure how he missed, it must have been a fluke, the tires tracks are so close, you would have thought the body of the truck would have extended out far enough to hit the car.

Already a fight this morning in the park, I can’t wait to see what happens next. It’s not even a full moon!

Our last bit of news! Cold weather coming, we are bracing for a bout of Bird Flu in the Park.

Comments always welcome,

DIY at-home cardio stress test.

~ Ron Walker ~ 15 Comments

It’s just before sundown Tuesday evening. I need to mow the lawn here in the Trailerhood. Takes under 30 minutes.

Mowing chore is done, daylight fading, but you can still see without needing a flashlight. While taking the mower back to the large storage building which sits at an angle to the trailer, there is an area about 6 feet across to pass through. I’m exhausted at this point after swimming through the humidity mowing the lawn.

In that nano second

Passing through the area going to the storage, pushing the mower that is not negotiating the loose dirt well, I am caught in a few stands of web. In that nano second, the brain registers that it is now getting dusk, all the spiders are setting up webs for the night. That thought precipitated me nearly breaking my neck trying to run over the mower which is bogging in the loose dirt, pushing it and flailing my arms in horror. I have a really powerful dislike of Spiders.

The one I killed. Quarter in bottom of picture  for reference.

It’s a horror show! Turning around there are 3 large spiders at varying levels of height, first one starting about 6 feet up.  Apparently I walked through the angled lower anchor strand, that ran from the house to the storage building of this hideous spider. Luckily I happened into the web as he was ending a trip to the edge of the house, at about 3 feet off the ground. Look at it! Are those muscles? I thought I would have to change an article of clothing.

They drowned, or I bored them to death

I knew if I walked back that way, one of them might decide to drop on me, precipitating the coronary that I had just miraculously avoided moments ago.  After securing the mower in the storage, and arming myself with a stick, and made a dash through the same spot. Returning with some insecticide that was about 4+ years old. I sprayed the remaining 4 large spiders, using a spray bottle with a stream for distance. It killed two of the four, but not sure if they drowned, or I bored them to death.

Here are the others, I had to look them up for pictures since they were too high for the phone to get a good detailed picture. Yea, spiders are my Kryptonite.

  • It’s a bad boy when it can zig-zag double stitch.
  • Just damn ugly…
  • Watermelon with legs?

On the plus side, the scheduled stress test copay of $45 can be saved. 30 minutes of mowing grass with a non-self-propelled mower, in humidity you could cut with a knife, and getting the life scared out of me didn’t trip the circuit breaker of my ticker, it shouldn’t while walking on a treadmill. Sorry, Doc.

Comments welcome,

(softly please I’m still a tad jumpy.)

Tales from the Hood.(TrailerHood)

~ Ron Walker ~ 11 Comments

It’s been awhile. I was just sitting here thinking about my blogging slump. Thinking I have nothing to share. Then thoughts flowed into my head, like light into a dark closet as you open the door.

RIP, Otis

I mentioned this little dog in a post over a year ago.  Small white dog with nappy tangled hair over his eyes. He never really bothered anyone, other than the fact that for some reason, the park owner allowed Otis and the tiny Pomeranian to run loose. Otis being his macho self, would pee on any available tires. That’s just what dogs do, plus it was not like he would be able to aim very high. People would complain, and eventually the elderly lady put up a fence around her lot. Only real problem? Otis was kin to Houdini.

Someone poisoned Otis a short time back, I just learned of it last week. Otis was found laying in the yard, foam in his mouth. The elderly woman never bothers anyone, she holds church classes on her porch most Wednesdays. She rents out a room from time to time for extra income.  RIP little fella, you broke the rules, and made us laugh at times, you probably angered some idiot that buys a brand-new muscle car, puts expensive wheels on them that they “rent”, and then move into a trailer park, so they can afford the wheels.  You certainly didn’t deserve to have your life  ended that way.

That didn’t take long

Your lucky if you have good neighbors in parks like this. A quiet lady moved in two spaces down, in a small camper. She put a fence up for her dog to be outside. She would walk it each day. In mid July the people 2 spaces down from her, were out in the road firing large fireworks near her lot. People here said she and her dog had PTSD. No, don’t ask. I didn’t get an answer I could wrap my head around either. She called the county deputies, who came out and told her since it was in the county, there was nothing illegal. Naturally, she and the bums with the fireworks had words, she packed up and left a week later. 

Third World Country on wheels.

I took a walk around the park the other evening, I haven’t done it in a couple months or more. It used to be a daily ritual of mine before they accidentally over-medicated me. Amazing what you will see when you pay attention. Some yards are immaculate, some not so much. I spotted one lot, that had the cars obviously parked, so that the repossession man couldn’t get to one without damaging the other. There are still a couple of confederate flags observed in some windows, We call them, Red-Neck curtains. A couple of places has cars, where the tires and huge wheels out value the vehicle, by a country mile. About the best thing about this park, is they insist on no junk clutter, and the grass must be mowed. Once you lift the veil of those two items, you find the other world, with wheels.

Comments always welcome,

Trailer Park Life. Take what you can. Professional Government Moochers (PGM) award winners.

~ Ron Walker ~ 9 Comments

It’s not fair to put this squarely on trailer park life, it happens everywhere, but I would put the majority of the practice in housing projects or trailer parks. Since this example is here where I am, I thought I would share it. In this environment, Michelle and I each have a skill. I read people, every opportunity would find me in material and classes on body language, speech nuances etc.

Michelle at Halloween

I spent 8 years in the mental health field (law-enforcement arm) and taught classes at 3 police academies on the mentally/emotionally disturbed. Michelle is a people person. She can have you telling family secrets, in under 2 hours. She’s amazing. It’s not done intentionally, her personality just seems to relax people.

While we keep to ourselves, we don’t purposely shun anyone. Some of them don’t like us, because we are allegedly Satan Worshipers.  Open the ears and eyes, keep your verbal contributions minimal, and you’ll be surprised at what is under the onion layers. We have met a couple of what we call normal people (2 out of the 20 units?). Some are funny, some are crafty and illegal. Some are pitiful. 

 

PGM award winner:                           
They live together, both are in their early 20s, have a baby. She doesn’t work. He works “under the table” $500 a week, no taxes taken out. That is so the welfare system won’t cut the food stamps they receive, or his unemployment check. They also get supplemental money and supplies for the baby. The girl and baby are on Medicaid. They often move, living with family, friends, and rentals in parks.

No job, no baby daddy = Benefits.

Here in Alabama, if you have 3 trailers in proximity, we call it a park LOL. They reveal the benefits are the reason they are not married. They just live together, and report she lives alone, and he has abandoned her. No job, no baby daddy = Benefits. No medical bills to speak of, no food bills, but they still waste to the point of not having enough for the month. Parties, and trips to the creek with friends etc. Oh, to supplement their income, they sell some food allowance to others. I can think of about 6 charges off the top of my head, without digging deeper, most of them felonies. These folks are nomad like, never in one place for very long, using someone else’s address (usually a family or friends) as if it was their official address, for the benefits.

Do you report it? Been there done that! I used to try even when I was a cop. The state workers themselves, would tell me there was no money or resources to go after the ones I reported. One suspect lived within 12 miles of the courthouse, and he could be seen standing around out in the county with sheriff deputies chatting, while having outstanding warrants or court orders on him regarding the reports. He was out of my jurisdiction, so I could not execute the warrants. These people come up with all sorts of ways to make money, most of it illegal, the easy money is generally always an illegal method, mostly for beer, or drugs, some just to squeak by.

Friends? Nope. As the line in the hilarious movie “Money Pit” goes, “Let’s not go there again”.
Now, to lighten the mood, a clip from that movie.

Do you have people in your area as devious?
Comments welcome,

For those not familiar with the movie, Walter and his wife are pouring money into an old mansion to fix it (I can relate). Nothing is going right. He has gone to the kitchen to check on the turkey in the oven, and get some warm water for their bath. At one point in the scene he says “Let’s not go there again”. I hope you have time to watch the 3-minute segment, it may brighten your day.