Trailer Park Life

Life in a Trailer Park can sometimes be funny, sad, crazy or plain interesting.

It’s so hard to say goodbye. (without smiling) Toodles to the Troll.

~ Ron Walker ~ 15 Comments

There are songs about, “It’s hard to say goodbye”. I can’t say it applies to this instance. It seems the Troll, is retiring. If your not familiar with who the Troll is, just search the blog for troll. The resident manager came by yesterday with a printed page telling residents, about him retiring, that she will remain the resident manager. He won’t be taking calls anymore,  one of his sons is taking over the park.

Happy Retirement!

Here’s hoping she wasn’t thinking that I was going to be sad or anything, I was doing my best not to break out in a big grin, kind of like getting that rock out of your shoe finally. It was sweet of her to hand us a Christmas card though. Yea, I mentally checked

it for money as I opened it. After all I have put up with here, I figure maybe they owe me. I guess I was feeling a tad snide as I closed the door. I stood there thinking how strange it is, on one hand they make sure they pass out official looking letters, advising you of rules, Then they do something so stupid and out of left field, like paying one of the tenants $50 to use a shovel, and scoop off the top layer of poop from the septic tank and toss it in the bed of a pickup truck, instead of hiring an official pump truck.

Not sure if they are planning some type of retirement/going away shindig, Of course, some of them out here may throw their own party, in celebration of his leaving. I can’t close this without a few memories of the old boy

  • The day he was very rude to the mother-in-law when we first moved in.
  • The day after we moved in, and I cussed him out for being so pushy and cursing in front of Michelle and her Mom.
  • The day he had walked through the yard ahead of me, then came back to ask if my dog bites, he was asking about the ceramic dog, just under the edge of the trailer, THAT, is some bad eyesight.
  • The day he came out to clean the edge of the drive and burn the leaves, but he managed to park one tire on a burning pile of leaves. That was a loud moment.
  • The best? And funniest. The day he was actually trying to be friendly and stopped outside my fence. It turned out he was in a good mood and wanted to compliment me on how my yard looked. He asks, “Did you have your trailer painted?” I look over my shoulder at the light green algae that had started to grow all along this north side. “No, but I did pressure wash it last year.” I replied. Apparently he was trying to be nice for a change. I had been told he can’t see very well, He thanked me for being a great homeowner, fires up his mower, and with a wave he’s gone. I stood there watching him trundle down the road on the mower, his straw hat pulled down firmly on his head. I hope I’m still that mobile at 82 years old.

You can never tell, the next person may be worse than him, and we find ourselves wishing he was still around. Now I will have to retire my Troll picture I use in posts sometimes.

Comments welcome, have you ever been glad to see someone go?

You never know what will work, even unintentionally.

~ Ron Walker ~ 19 Comments

Is this a real Witch?

As they say in the South “Who’da Thunk it!”

We moved in 2 years ago, naturally we were greeted, and constantly invited to churches in the area. We politely declined. I was a little worried about the neighborhood, after my good neighbor told me, that maybe I shouldn’t park Michelle’s Harley on the side of the trailer. He said it would be no surprise if 3 people drove up late, loaded it on a trailer and took off. I told him I’d hate that, but it was fully insured. No ones touched it so far. Thinking back on it, the past year has been really quiet.

It wasn’t until about 2 weeks ago, while talking to the owner that used to live in our trailer,  I learned we are “Devil Worshipers” according to what he has heard,  That explains the quiet, the cessation of people knocking on the door late, wanting change, or use the phone. As they say in the South “Who’da Thunk it!” After I stopped laughing to the point of almost passing out, I asked him where did that come from. He related he didn’t know the origin, only that the man down the street that is always in the church, “Had heard some things”. The word is to steer clear of us, we probably do satanic stuff. They know I’m an ex-cop, someone else’s rumor, has bestowed on me the rank of high priest. Just don’t bother “them”. Be nice, and polite, they can cause bad things, best to just leave them alone. That’s the gist of it.

Apparently..

October 2016 (last year) was our first Halloween, so we set up for the grand-kids, or any trick-or-treaters in the area. Michelle likes to decorate all out when she can. We always invited the kids friends over for a bonfire when we lived on our own land. So, to be in the spirit (no pun intended), we had 3 foot Frankenstein and Dracula, plastic illuminated figures in the yard near the porch. There were spiderwebs on the porch, a large motorized Gargoyle, motion activated, that talked and moved his wings. A couple skulls with blinking eyes, Candles, Silver Goblets, a large sword, with the table set up like a palm reader. We thought it festive and cute, everyone else thought we were for real apparently. Maybe Michelle dressed as a Witch (which she pulls off really well) didn’t help…  In hindsight, had I talked her mother into dressing up as a witch and sitting on the porch, maybe we would be the only ones here in the park now.

Lawn chairs, and hot-dogs on sticks

Now in the country, in the South, in a trailer park, that can be good, or bad. On one hand, these people are highly superstitious, and fearful of the unknown. Since we have not been burned to the ground, or seen evidence of protesters in the road out front carrying signs, inviting us to burn in Hell, they still speak to us and wave, I guess we are safe. That’s good. On the other hand, if the place catches fire, we can look for people showing up with lawn chairs, and hot-dogs on sticks. Not good. Michelle has been wanting a pygmy goat, I guess now would be a weird time to have one as a pet, wandering the yard. Think of the rumors!

No Kool-Aid for me thanks, I’m driving.

This area, in and around the park for miles, seems to be afflicted with crazy people. I’m sorry, that is an old, outdated term, and I mean no slander against someone suffering mentally or emotionally. I spent 8 years working around people with mental health problems, I know the sadness it causes. Anyway, there are numerous calls in a 2-mile radius of us regarding suicide attempts, emotionally disturbed, or overdose.  Maybe a study on the water is in order. One small church down the road, apparently has a Jim Jones/Guyana wannabe. He is strongly suggesting, that his congregation consider signing over ownership, of their properties to the church. Excuse me for being normal, but I think I’ve seen this movie, and it didn’t end well.

To sum my life up for the last year, I live in a trailer park, I’ve had a massive heart attack, I’m married to a Witch, I’ve been socially promoted to some type of high priest, and both of us are Satan worshipers. It’s probably a good idea that we were busy this year, and missed doing anything for Halloween.  Should I walk around the park from time to time swinging some type of incense burner and mumbling to myself? Nah.

Comments always welcome,

It snowed today, our world, stood still.

~ Ron Walker ~ 17 Comments

Others laugh when I describe our region after a snow. Our world stops, dead. This is the south, center part of the south really. We used to see snow maybe, once every 6 or so years. Then came global warming, no wait, that’s supposed to make it hotter? But it snows more? That line of thought gives me a headache.

Schools are out early (But I have a plan!)

Areas 50 miles north of us see snow nearly every year. For the last 10 years, we have had it at least, once every other year. Then it is only a little and gone in an hour or so. Today, we have a full on blizzard looking snowfall. It is covering everything in about 3 inches so far. Schools are out early, cars are plowing into power poles, the ones that miss the poles are filling the ditches. This is an interesting area when your county law-enforcement supervisors, feel the need to announce over the radio, to advise all units to use caution while driving. Really?

 

Who wants to get their man-card suspended

Drivers here just scoot along like it’s talcum powder on the roadway. Snow chains? Rednecks use them on hunting boots during Deer season, not on tires. They laugh, who wants to get their man-card suspended for using silly chains. On Facebook right now, those with the huge trucks sporting the 40-inch wheels, and elevated up in the air by 3 feet, are asking if anyone needs a tow from a ditch. Sure, pull them out of the ditch, just how far are they going to go once they are freed, just down to the next ditch? Pole? That is the thinking in these parts, scary I know. The big tires, and jacked-up ground clearance, will count for zilch on icy roadways.

 

I heard Russia has offered Alabama, use of their old snow-plows.

Of course even in this crazy weather We have the trailer park denizens to enjoy. Johnny Reb took a ride around the park, cutting through our yard. Typical of him he had to do it fast in the snow. Dressed all in black, hoodie up to cover his head, he almost reminded me of the Grim Reaper. His stumpy self nearly met the reaper, as he veered through our yard sliding  very close to the ditch, He apparently didn’t realize how slippery that mush was. Of course, it was over before I could get my phone camera going.

David the maintenance man, was seen tooling through the snow fall on his way to his buddies house. I heard him coming a block away. Several vehicles have exited the park onto that roadway playing. One went side to side spinning tires, another did a complete 360, probably needs a change of pants. They do it on purpose! To think they also breed… 

The snow is still falling, the coffee is making, and the fireplace is warming up. See you all later.

Freaky Friday, Twilight Zone in the Trailer Park.

~ Ron Walker ~ 19 Comments

Hello Blogging friends, it’s been a rather quiet Friday as they go. I was trying some new software, half of the graphics, graphs and options (weather software) were not working. The developer of it had no idea, nor anyone else in the support forum. After 5 hours of searching and testing, I found one, apostrophe, had confused the entire software. Where was it at? In front of me the whole time. Ron’s Country Weather. I wanted to kick my own apostrophe!

People shouting in the park, dogs barking next to us. They normally don’t bother me. Today there came a point, when I was about to ask Michelle if there was money enough in the bank for bail. This evening we had a wreck down the road, man was thrown from his pickup that rolled, and he hit a tree with his body, killed him instantly. Down the road about 2 miles, and within a mile of one another, a couple of people lost their marbles and had to be chased down. I’m beginning to think, maybe I should get the plastic sheets and tape out, seal the house up. It might be in the air.

 

How do you blow yourself up with a cream soda drink. Give it to my mother-in-law. I heard the load boom/kapow all the way in my office with the door closed. She says it just burst when she took the top off. It didn’t take a forensic genius to figure out from all the liquid, that she apparently dropped it, Then decided to open it. The bottle didn’t burst, but we never found the cap to it. It was loud, so it was close to exploding the bottle itself.

Right now, I have some unhealthy Krystal Hamburgers about to arrive, and I am going to chow down. I hope all of you had a nice Friday.

Comments welcome,