We have some dunce that travels our main highway apparently heading home from work around 9:30-10pm nearly every night. Some nights I’m outside enjoying the air when he comes by. It is a jacked up Mudding truck (a local sport in this area) with what sounds like straight pipes for exhaust. It also sounds like he is driving in 2nd or low gear (automatic) as he passes the trailer park at about 30 mph. He is in no hurry, opting to get some perverse pleasure out of the blasting of those pipes. I have to admit I have said a silent prayer that maybe the redneck motor God will smite him one evening.

I picture myself standing in the yard, or sitting on the porch as he blasts past and a bolt of invisible lightning causes the motor to burst itself into a billion jingling pieces of metal inside the engine block. Then I can sit there and sip my coffee and watch as he drifts slowly to the side of the road. It will probably never happen, unless his perchance for driving by in low gear with high rpm’s finally takes a toll on the ragged POS.

Maybe if I made an effigy of that truck and stuck pins into it I could at least feel really good if it blows up the engine while I insert the needle?

Comments always welcome, If I can hear them.

Actually I can’t hear them from here but it made the title rhyme. Listening to the Police Scanner tonight the local rednecks are out in force. Someone just reported his own brother who is having a drunken bonfire in a field next to his home. It seems he is bothering his brother by running around in the field drunk driving his pickup truck and shooting his gun in the air.

That seems to be a common theme in this part of the country. Beer, Bonfires and things that go boom! Just for a Saturday night chuckle let’s view how “not” to make a bonfire. Gasoline makes fumes that explode violently when they have sat long enough. Maybe they should start printing that little tip on the side of the Beer Cans. I once watched a rural volunteer firefighter almost perform this same stunt after a few brews, only he didn’t stand on the pile and pour the Gasoline. Apparently the brew kills those brain cells really quickly. Without further delay, let’s see how not to start a bonfire. 1:44 mins long but worth the laugh.

Warmer weather brings out the nut cases also. Speaking of which there have been at least three mental emotional calls in an area within a 5 mile radius of us. Could it be in the water? If so I see some cases of bottled water in my immediate future.

Comments and chuckles welcome,