Okay, the attention getting title is just a pun, but these citations really stunk? Stank? Smelled bad. This morning I got a chuckle out of another blogger’s post at Views and Mews by Coffee Kat. The subject was the smell left by dying pests in and around your home. Some animals are horrible, other smaller ones don’t stink as much after death. How is your olfactory sense. Good? Bad? Mine is okay. There was about a two-week time, when I could smell colors. Check out my post on that from 2014 The Old RedBull joke, is no longer funny.
Many years ago, right after the invention of the wheel, I was a Police Motorcycle Officer. I loved it. Nothing better than getting paid to ride a massive Harley Davidson, and enjoy the ride. On one occasion I had a mystery odor that was shared unintentionally with many people.
On the right side of the Harley, as pictured below, was a leather pouch that was attached to the front edge of the saddlebag. This carried the Citation book, which was a flip open aluminum type. We kept our motorcycles immaculate, or as close as possible. Wiping them down each afternoon at the start of the shift. The pouch carried nothing but the citation book. The book was always removed at the end of the shift. Once in a while we blew it out with air to remove excess dust, or items that might have been picked up from the air. Nothing larger ever got in, due to it being protected by our leg in front, and the air-stream flowing around the bike.
I was off for three days. Upon my return to work, I noticed a strange smell each time I would be filling out a citation. It was a light smell, even with putting my nose close enough to the paper to touch it, but slightly repugnant. Thinking it must be the printing process or the paper. I continued to write citations, even getting a new book, the odor continued to haunt me. This continued for about a week. Then it got strong enough to resemble the odor of decomposition after death. Apparently, a small young bird had flown into the shed where we kept the motors, flew into the pouch and died. That, or by some million in one chance, it did get scooped into the pouch while riding. And now the smell was permeating the paper of the book.
I got ribbed by the others, but I reminded them they also had their nose to the book trying to identify the odor. Not to mention, somewhere there were about 75 people that week, probably sitting around grumbling and sniffing the citations, trying to figure out why they had such an odor. No one complained, so that was a plus.
That’s my story, and I’m sticking to it.
Comments welcome, (no sniffs please)
That’s a story you couldn’t make up. When I was an EMT, we complained about the bad taste of water in the tea and coffee, despite it being boiled. When they sent someone in to check, they found three dead pigeons in the tank.. We never had the first clue about how they had got in there, as it had a heavy metal lift-off lid. Must have been ‘sabotage’. 🙂
Best wishes, Pete.
Oh wow, that was a gross discovery. I’d say that would be a bad taste. Too bad they didn’t catch those responsible. Thanks for the comment Pete.
That is a great story but at least when you rode, the wind blew the smell away! Pete’s story about the dead pigeons in the water tank is just gross. When I worked at an off-site training facility we had an ice machine. One day the custodians didn’t have a lot of work so they decided to clean it. It was full of water worms. Never used ice again!
The smell wasn’t quite strong enough at first to detect just standing next to the bike. I guess because it was so small.
I have heard about things in ice machines growing. I have seen some gross looking tea urns in restuarants.
Pete’s experiance tops mine by a mile! I can’t imagine thinking of the taste and how much I’d consumed, after the pigeons were found.
Thanks for the comment, Kate.
When I was in the eighth grade we put a sandwich high on a shelf in the classroom and waited for the teacher to find the odor. We were pains in the ass as you can see. He finally found it. Unfortunately he had no doubt of how the sandwich had arrived on the shelf. So extra homework ensued.
You all were pretty devious. We put tacks in the substitute teacher’s chair. She was a large woman, she would attempt to jump up, but would just wind up sitting down hard again. We never did find out which kid put them there.
Thanks for the laugh, Elizabeth.
I thought your post made me gag, but that was nothing compared to reading Peter Johnson’s comment re the pigeons, above. Ewwww!
Yes, that one really did well with the pigeons. 🙂